Thursday, May 17, 2007

You've Got Mail! (But That Is All You'll Get)

There is commitment phobia; marriage phobia; children phobia - and now the Internet has created a whole new set of phobias. Some people really do want to go out and have a serious relationship - while some people are interested in collecting profile pictures. It often seems that there is a whole army of men and women putting up profiles on Internet dating sites with their photographs just to start email relationships.

This guy below needed a watch, a better excuse and some brains. He also should have learned from someone that wimping out is not exactly the courageous way to go. The woman involved obviously spent a great deal of effort and time in this date. The guy - well he remains one of those ever-present Internet ghosts.

So this is the hell some have to go through even before they get to go out on their first Date Out Of Hell!

Nathan and I began emailing on a free singles site. He lives in the same city, his picture looked good... he appeared quite the hunk, and he indicated he was very interested in me. The letters were rapidly zinging both ways, so it seemed appropriate to suggest a coffee. He agreed right away so we arranged a time & place.

I showed up and he didn't. I gave up, went home and tried to find out if we had just gotten the time wrong because I'd been sure he said 10 AM. Hours later he finally answered my email and said he was sorry, he didn't feel well.

Well, being the nurturing sort, I sent him a picture of a bowl of chicken soup. He wrote back, apologizing again. I said no problem, sometimes things can't be helped. (my bad) .. When he read that, he was moved and more genuinely apologetic. He then said we could reschedule it for the following Thursday. I said okay, when would work? ... HOURS went by, but that site's system shows email read status, so I knew he'd read it as soon as I sent it.

When Nathan eventually answered, he never mentioned the coffee meet time or place, tho' I specifically asked him to let me know if it worked for him. I asked again once more... by now I'm getting annoyed, and I thought he might be feeling pressured so I said 'look, I know this is an awkward way to meet, and maybe the idea is easier than actually being face-to-face. That's how I feel and I wondered if you might as well.' ... he answers, saying 'did we have a time?' ... sighing loudly to myself at this point, I said 'what about 6:30 PM?' ... once more! No email for hours, and when it does come, there's no mention of any meeting plans. I got fed up and wrote that it didn't look like we were going to manage to meet. He responded IMMEDIATELY, saying I was 'fickle, LOL' .. I got angry then. I wrote saying 'I've noticed that if I ask about when to meet, I wait hours for a reply. Yet when I say I'm about to pack it in, you're there INSTANTLY.' ... his answer was that I needed to examine why I keep doing this to myself, and to get back to him when I had figured it out.

... all this drama and we had never gotten to meet.

I told him that it's up to him now if he wants to know me; to make the effort, or not. Once more he spun it around, accusing me of only seeing what I want to see (I pointed out that maybe his being sick was a case of 'cold feet'), and admitting absolutely nothing about his 'sudden' sickness before the coffee meet. He was sounding just fine the night before. It wasn't so much the being sick either, it was that he didn't bother to let me know he couldn't come until hours later, even though he had read my message as soon as I'd sent it.

Blocked!!!! ...I'm so exhausted by this guy! What a relief to nip this off, I can't even imagine liking him in person. The dude's just wa-a-a-ay too defensive and flaky.
Submitted by: Anonymous

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1 comment:

CatWoman said...


Yes yes yes. I know this guy. Everything is twisted to make you look like you're losing your mind.
They play games to paint you as a head case. NEVER EVER again will I go for this bullshit.